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woensdag 30 maart 2011

Comeback.

So my back is well hurtin', y'all.

This is because I lifted too many bags today at work. I didn't follow the advice of a colleague, which was to make passengers move their own damn luggage. Me, with my overdone British sense of customer service (load of buggery bollocks), managed to hurt my back so now my muscles ache. It's not that bad, but I feel compelled to moan about it. Maybe I am becoming Belgian...

As for the "y'all" (which a uni friend of mine tried to tell me once that it is a perfectly acceptable 2nd person plural pronoun - I don't even care if the grammar books say it is correct, I still say it's bloody buggery bollocks. I mean, whoever translated "vous" from French, "vosotros" from Spanish, or "jullie" from Dutch into "y'all"? No-one, that's who, and if they have, they should be shot), I'm decided whether or not I'm going to have to tone down my jokey anti-american attitude. Sometimes I mean it, but most of the time I don't. I've met my fair share of Americans and they're fine, really, with a couple I would say are really cool. Anyway, this is because I'm going to be starting a training course at work to work with US Airways.

I've got these booklets of info about customer service and smiling, which I'm sure will defnately make for an interesting mind-numbing read.  Tomorrow is my last day of 4-hour shifts, as my contract was upgraded so I work 75% of full-time (which means a smooth 6.5 hours a day. Sweet.

On an unrelated note, my sister Sarah and her boyfriend Jordan are setting off on Saturday on their trip around the world for a whole year! I'm so jealous and can't wait to get out there myself.  They have started a blog which I'm hoping they will update as well and as often as they can, so for your interest, here it is:


http://jordansarahadventure.blog.co.uk/

Life is going well at the moment, I had a good day at work today, although I had a slight run-in with a passenger who had too much baggage that I really couldn't overlook. I told her she could pay a surcharge, but she didn't want to for her own reasons. She then tried to get other people she didn't know to take one of the packages she had. I told her she couldn't as it is against security rules. She then proceeded to ask the man checking-in next to her if he would take it. He accepted, but of course I couldn't let that happen. Suffice to say the situation became awkward with her asking just about every other passenger, trying to get them to take the package. It's quite simple - you don't do it. It was interesting to talk to at least 3 other passengers who were disappointed that I wouldn't let them accept the package of this stranger they had just met. In the end, a complete stranger who had taken his friend to the airport for the same flight, exchanged numbers with her and agreed to take her package home with him. Problem solved. Despite her being a little upset with me that I didn't just let her take it, it was still nice (in a way) to see how people in her community came together and helped her.  All I can say is that I have rules to follow, otherwise I lose my job. Not gonna happen, love.

People roll their eyes when you ask "have you packed this bag yourself/have you accepted anything from a stranger to take with you?" etc. I mean, who would do that?

As for the title of this post, (I almost forgot to mention) I will be making a guest appearance on a local radio station, thanks to a mate from work who has her own show there. There's another show where they interview djs and play their mixes, and yours truly will be rocking the radio waves on the 23rd April, on Spits FM. The interview will be in Dutch, which will probably end up being the comedy highlight.  Still looking forward to it though, as I'm thinking about getting back into the whole djing malarkey... stay tuned.

donderdag 24 maart 2011

Because I'm copying off Garragay....

A - Age: 22
B - Bed size: double, but hard as a rock.

C - Chore you hate: Opening the door. I have to go downstairs as the bell doesn't work yet.
D - Don't eat: Snails. I tried them recently and.... no, just no.
E - Essential start-your-day item: A cuppa
F - Favourite board game: Trivial Pursuit
G - Gold or Silver: Silver, cos I's gots its on ma fingers, yo.
H - Height: 180cm, according to my medical exam for work.
I - Instruments you play: Piano, Guitar, and the good old recorder. Nowt like it.
J - Job title: Check-in Agent (said in a Flemish accent)
K - Kid(s): Only if they don't shout, and only if they're related to me. Can't stand other people's kids.
L - Love or lust: Both (in agreement with Warragay)
M - Mum's name: Jeannine (note the foreign-ish spelling)
N - Nicknames: Cooper, raver, Dave the Rave, gay. You know the score....

O - Overnight hospital stay other than birth: Never. I cracked my head open once, but they just glued it up with cat gut. Ahh the good old days...
P - Pants or pantyhose: Pants, because I'm not sure what pantyhose are. Are they tights?
Q - Favourite Movie Quote: "You'll go down for this." "I only go down for a price, and I doubt that you could afford it."Julie Walters in Personal Services.
R - Right or left handed: Right. Because it's normal.
S - Siblings: One elder sister and one twin sister.
T - Time you wake up: Whenever I need/want to.
U - Underwear: Most of the time.
V - Vegetable favorite: At the moment, somewhere between a courgette and a mushroom.
W - Ways you run late: Public transport. Belgium just doesn't work in general...
X - X-rays you've had: Teeth x-rays. That's about it.
Y - Yummy food you make: Chilli con carne, and I do a good curry, being from Bradford and all....
Z - Zoo favourite: Don't often go to zoos, but maybe will make a trip to Antwerp zoo. Or maybe Chester zoo!




Берлин

Dag allemaal!

So it's been a while, but only because my internet has stopped working chez moi, so I haven't had nearly enough time to update the old blog on my happenings.  The title of this blog is "Berlin", written in Russian/Cyrillic - I was simply curious as to what it would look like.

As previous posts indicate, I went to Berlin to visit some friends. That's Lukas (Looookas).

It was simply fabulous. However, not fabulous in the way that I expected. It was quite quite different to the Berlin I had created in my head - crazy people with purple hair and nose rings everywhere, artists and hippies lining the streets, grungy electro clubs and shit loads of currywurst.  All stereotypes I'm sure you wouldn't have to try very hard to find, but nevertheless it is always refreshing to find that this is not the mainstream.  I guess I know that stereotypes that apply to a majority are rarely realised when you visit a country/city, but it's always nice to not be so educated (by yourself or taught) about a place before you go there, and just be innocently surprised and enlightened. Put simply; don't read too many guide books, just enjoy it.

I thought of this as we were cycling on the runways of the old Tempelhof Airport one day - it felt great to be enjoying such a wide open space on a sunny (yet excessively windy) day, bang smack in the middle of the city. It also made me realise that I'm glad that I have various friends dotted around the world - it's nice to go and spend time with them and do the things that they do, sampling their lifestyle alongside all the great sightseeing we enjoy as tourists.

Windsurfing on the runways at Zentralflughafen, as you do. You can see the ball tower in the distance.

On the Friday night, we went to Lukas' flat for a barbecue (cold but the sun had been shining) which was fabulous. We drank and ate and I spoke terrible German, but more of that later. Holly came over (a friend from uni who also lives there now) and got suitably fresh and had a great catch up.  Afterwards we adjourned to a club not far away. A great little place in someone's cellar, you had to walk through this old living room and downstairs. As we walked in a 30s style cabaret band was just finished and then the dj started up playing similar music. It was great! It was old fashioned music but it had a great beat behind it which just made you want to dance, and not even in some "alternative/ironic/look-at-me-I'm-different" douche bag kind of way, it was just good music. It slowly developed into some deep/tech house which was cool and the we spent the rest of the night dancing. I met some nice people who I am sure I will never meet again, but I will remember this girl's cool red hair. I remember being told to make sure I was quiet with Holly outside, as the place didn't have a licence and had been shut down once already. Fab. 

If you want to go here, ask Lukas or Catherine.

The next day Catherine and I went for a walk and visited the Berlin Gallery, as there was a new photo exhibition on from a photographer who took some cool photos in New York and Berlin during various points in the late 20th century (I know that's recent-ish but it's easier than saying "between the 60s and 2000s/noughties/whatever the hell we call them). That night we went over to one of their friends' flats for a birthday meal - we brought brownies, which we named "chocolate squares" as they were too much like cake. After eating a very tasty risotto and other things, we spent the evening drinking and talking and listening to music. I spoke a shit load of terrible German this time, but only because at the beginning of the evening, it was clear that I was the only one there that wasn't German/had studied German. I remember thinking that I could sit here and wait for someone to speak English, or I could just get on with it and have some fun with it. It felt like when I started my year abroad and felt that I couldn't speak a word of French or Spanish despite having studied it, which is, contrary to how it sounds, extremely invigorating and stimulating. I enjoyed that evening a lot and reminded me that I do have the balls to just go for things, as lately I feel like I have been holding myself back (only slightly) from certain things. So big up to Deutschland and the guys at the party for making me feel welcome and speaking some German with me!


The last day was spent cycling at the Zentralflughafen as I mentioned before, then in a cafe with coffee and bagels.

Catherine and I then went for a cycle along the canal (the weather was beautiful the whole time I was there) before stopping off for the rest of the afternoon in a bar for a extended catch up and gossip. 

That evening we went for some great tapas with Holly at Maria Mulata and then on to a bar across the road for the rest of the night. The hangover kicked in on the plane the next morning, by the way.

Thanks to Catherine, Lukas, Holly and everyone who showed me a lovely time there. I can't wait to go back. Eurovision party chez Foster is calling...


donderdag 3 maart 2011

"Me love you long time..."

I was watching clips of American Dad (link to episodes here) on Youtube (I'm chilling out before I set of to Berlin) and watched this particular clip of Roger (my favourite character) as Laura van der Booben:


Anyway, I wanted to know what the song was when he walked through the office, and I found it.

I wasn't sure if the lyrics were actually real or not, but they are - and I think you should have a listen... all the way through, as it gets better/worse as it goes on, depending on your personal music/lyrical tastes. Enjoy.

Also, the names of the rappers are hilarious. So 90s it's not funny.


<sample from Full Metal Jacket>
What'll we get for ten dollars?
Every 'ting you want
Everything?
Every'ting
Ooh! Don't do that, baby! Ahh!
Hold on this! Oh, sock it to me! Aaahh!
Ooohh!
</sample from Full Metal Jacket>

Chorus (repeated):
<sample from Full Metal Jacket>
Ahh! Me so horny!
Me love you long time!
</sample from Full Metal Jacket>

Verse 1: [Brother Marquis]
Sittin' at home with my dick on hard
So I got the black book for a freak to call
Picked up the telephone, then dialed the 7 digits
Said, "Yo, this Marquis, baby! Are you down with it?"
I arrived at her house, knocked on the doo
rNot having no idea of what the night had in store
I'm like a dog in heat, a freak without warning
I have an appetite for sex, 'cause me so horny

Chorus

Verse 2: [Fresh Kid Ice]
Girls always ask me why I fuck so much
I say "What's wrong, baby doll, with a quick nut?"
'Cause you're the one, and you shouldn't be mad
I won't tell your mama if you don't tell your dad
I know he'll be disgusted when he sees your pussy busted
Won't your mama be so mad if she knew I got that ass?
I'm a freak in heat, a dog without warning
My appetite is sex, 'cause me so horny

Chorus

Verse 3: [Brother Marquis]
You can say I'm desperate, even call me perverted
But you say I'm a dog when I leave you fucked and deserted
I'll play with your heart just like it's a game
I'll be blowing your mind while you're blowing my brains
I'm just like that man they call Georgie Puddin' Pie
I fuck all the girls and I make 'em cry
I'm like a dog in heat, a freak without warning
I have an appetite for sex, 'cause me so horny.

Chorus
Breakdown(4x):
<sample from Full Metal Jacket>
Ahh! Hold on this! Oh, sock it to me!
</sample from Full Metal Jacket>

Chorus

Verse 4: [Fresh Kid Ice]
It's true, you were a virgin until you met me
I was the first to make you hot and wetty-wetty
You tell your parents that we're goin' out
Never to the movies, just straight to my house
You said it yourself, you like it like I do
Put your lips on my dick, and suck my asshole too
I'm a freak in heat, a dog without warning
My appetite is sex, 'cause me so horny

Chorus
Breakdown (repeated):
<sample from Full Metal Jacket>
Fuckie suckie. Me fuckie suckie.
</sample from Full Metal Jacket>

dinsdag 1 maart 2011

Eurovision is calling...

So I made a really big plate of stir-fry, as I was in dire need of some vegetables. I've been unable to concentrate properly so I thought some vitamins etc. would do the trick.






May it also be noted that I am currently watching "Cloverfield" on 2BE.

It.            Is.            Shite.

Anywho, I've otherwise been entertaining myself with Eurovision videos. I've been checking out a few of the entries and here are some of my picks - good and bad. I'll let everybody else decide which are good and bad...

I like this one - it was about the first one I heard. But great Eurovision dance pop!

A favourite of mine - reminds me of my year abroad in Valencia. Probably the accordion sounding thingamibob.

Italy, not the best comeback. In fact that's too polite. It's just shit. Stop trying so hard, Italy - it's EUROVISION!!

Belgium on the other hand, bless them, not trying hard enough. I blame the government. Oh, wait...


Still better than the Netherlands with "Je vecht nooit allen", which I shan't even bother to post. No. Just no.

Glen Vella of Malta, flying the rainbow flag. FINALLY, a song with a key change!

I just don't know what's going to happen with this. 

Frightful as it is, I can imagine it doing better than Blue, probably because Blue are going to choose to sing live, rather than leave it to backing singers like real modern Eurovision performers. 

However, I will probably dedicate a whole post to the UK's entry. Anything's got to be better than Josh Dub-whatever.